What shud i..

Dear God,

I know this is not how shud i ask for some attention..

But i do need to clear my thought from keeping me out of focus.

I've made a decision that is killing myself : TO LOVE SOMEONE THAT SHOULD NOT BE THE ONE TO LOVE..

I've tried all these years, to love someone else.. But than the love wasnt strong enuff for me to forget n let go tìs person from my past..

It comes to my senses why all these years, i cudnt love anyone with all my heart, coz tis person is still there..

I tot all this while, tis person is gone, and doesnt bring much impact on me, but when looking back on the matter of time, it is..

The people i used to be with b4, resemble tis person. The background, the interest. Not only that. My interests also r influenced by tis person. Tis person overshadows me in everything..

The most obvious thing comes to my mind is, i become very sensitive to anyone with similar name. Those ppl will get my special attention just bcoz they hv similar name.. But at the end, i left them cold hearted bcoz they r not tat person. Not the same at all..

Wut shud i do? In silence, i cried. Most of the time. I am late. Late enuff till i lost tis person. I cant face my stupidity. My late. My action. My mistake for not having the courage to go n get tis person.

Now, tis person, even close but far from reach. I am really hurt with tis. I wanna wake up from tis hurt, but as if i lost my leg to stand. I dunno wut shud i do.

I do really love tis person, but i know i cant.. I shudnt..

Really, wut shud i do?

I dunwanna lose tis person, coz i dont think i cud bear to live without tis person.. again..

I am haunted by my past mistake of letting tis person go.. N i just cudnt let tis person go away.. again.. tis time..

Again, tell me, wut shud i do..

I am damn weak now.. And getting weaker..